Recap from Part 1
What causes smart people to do stupid things? Part 1 of Does Satan Spin Your Marriage illustrates this well when Jane welcomes her husband home and the outcome is not joyful.
In review, imagine that Jane is having an extremely rough day. The children are not on their best behavior, and she is feeling overwhelmed from daily responsibilities. She is hoping when her husband, Tom, comes home from work that they can connect. She wants to feel supported.
This is not the case today! Tom begins calmly sharing about his day, and Jane starts to feel anxiety and frustration. She interrupts Tom by saying, “Don’t you care about my day?” She continues to raise her voice, and the conversation ends in an argument.
Understanding how Satan spins our physical brain until we are literally out of our logical mind where we make decisions based on values is very helpful. Jane can learn how to prevent this pattern of arguments in the future.
The first part of the Satanic Spin happens when we get flashed with a subliminal or subconscious event from the past. It can be a sound, smell, taste, feel of something, or even a word that our brain picks up on. For Jane, her husband’s monotone voice triggered her brain to start into the Satanic Spin. The last time – and possibly several times in the past – this sound in conversation with her husband resulted in an argument. It didn’t cause the argument. Jane’s brain just made a connection with this sound and arguing.
This subliminal memory of hearing her husband’s monotone voice caused the negative chemicals in Jane’s brain to start dripping. As the drips increase, they may cause the frontal lobe (where imagination, creativity, reasoning, and values reside) to go to sleep. If your frontal lobe goes to sleep, you will make choices that are not based on your values. It’s as if you are literally out of your mind because these natural chemicals in your brain are in the same family as heroin!
Some of Jane’s values are to speak with patience, kindness and understanding to her husband. She clearly did not act by her values when she raised her voice at Tom.
The third part of the Satanic Spin happens when you have a partial feeling. Your amazing brain looks for things from the past that created this partial feeling and connects past events to your current situation. In Jane’s story, her partial feeling of anxiety showed up because she had experienced it many times in the past, especially in her interaction with her husband upon his arrival home from work.
It’s typical for us to not notice chemical changes in our bodies, especially men. But with adequate training, you can learn to describe changes in body chemistry with the words: bored, irritable, frustrated, anxious, depressed, lonely, angry, etc.
Imagine little buckets in your brain filled with chemicals. When the buckets are spilled the chemicals cause a variety of unique feelings. Satan is looking for the opportunity to tips those buckets with his fiery darts which are negative thoughts. He generally causes a few drops to be spilled at a time rather than a whole bucket. Wanting to remain undetected, this is another subtle strategy of the adversary.
As Christians, many of us believe in inspiration through Holy Ghost as we receive spiritual promptings through thoughts or feelings. Satan has similar power to influence our thoughts and feelings, but his intentions are to influence us for evil.
Satan causes much of the opposition we experience in this fallen world (See 2 Nephi 2:10-11, 15) and can influence our thoughts and feelings.
(Finish this article then consider downloading a free marriage relationship eBook by therapist Maurice Harker: I’m Not OK, You’re Not OK, But That’s OK!)
Logic – Your Thoughts
The human brain stores memories of everything you have ever seen, tasted, smelled, touched, felt or experienced in any way. Suppose you connected with someone you haven’t seen in a long while. The brain searches its filing cabinet with a question like “Where have I seen this person before?”
Jane’s brain flashed her with a memory of the past when the sound of her husband’s monotone voice occurred. This same sound led to an argument several times before. Jane didn’t feel safe in this situation. Your brain is always on the lookout for possible threats from the past to activate the survival mechanism in the middle animal brain.
For Jane, this subliminal memory in her brain’s filing cabinet – her husband’s monotone voice – caused the negative chemicals to start dripping. Your brain processes this entire four-phase cycle in less than one second. With every cycle, strong negative feelings increase along with deviant chemicals to sooth the mind to the point of being “stoned.” This causes the frontal lobe (where imagination, creativity, reasoning, and values reside) to go to sleep. If your frontal lobe goes to sleep, you will make choices that are not based on your values.
Although we always have free agency along the way, there is something to the old adage of Satan made me do it!
Do you have patterns of frustration, anxiety, sadness or guilt in your marriage relationship? If so, consider a complimentary 30-minute call with a Life Changing Services certified marriage coach by clicking the link below. This marriage assessment call will give you clarity on some great ways to move forward in strengthening your relationship against the influence of Satan.
If you missed Part 1 of Does Satan Spin Your Marriage click HERE for Part 1 that will explain more about the flash and chemical drip parts of the Satanic Spin.
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Maurice W. Harker, the head therapist at Life Changing Services, has a unique way of teaching about the adversary’s strategies to deceive and weaken ourselves and relationships. Learn how to develop keen awareness of the adversary’s influence in this free best-selling book “Like Dragons Did They Fight” available here for download: FREE BOOK